Follow us for more honest lifestyle advice and learn how to thrive. Be upfront, be honest, and stay away from dates who don’t fit with your financial ideal. Be aware that your partner doesn’t influence you to splurge. Increasing net worth – It might be challenging to buy a home together if one of the partners has debt.
Opinions expressed on this site are the author’s alone, not those of a third-party entity, and have not been reviewed, approved, or otherwise endorsed. On the other hand, if you are going into a relationship and you have debt, your partner may not be so inclined to jump into something with someone who has a significant amount of debt. Relationships can be complicated, and dating someone who’s in debt can make things even more complex. Get the full picture on dating someone with debt below, including how to help them, and five important questions to consider.
Starting a relationship with someone new is an exciting time filled with moments of giddy anticipation. As you and your new love interest progress beyond getting to know each other’s likes and dislikes to sharing the more intimate details of your lives, you’re likely going to want to have the money talk. But finances are undeniably an important part of any relationship and getting on the same page can help strengthen your commitment. If you’ve always used a credit card and you’ve always had a car payment, it might be hard to imagine how you’ll get by without them. Well, a lot of people believe this lie that a budget squashes your freedom.
There’s no clarity around their career or finance goals
The urge to hide or ignore money problems is understandable, but it’s crucial for partners to be honest about finances. Secrets and lies will only drive you apart and potentially lead to even worse financial issues. A potential red flag is if they have no clarity around their career and financial goals, as this makes it difficult to understand if you’re compatible in this realm.
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I would advise you not to reject a person just because he or she can’t handle finances efficiently. If you are better at it, help your significant other to learn it, too. Realistically, I’m not going to know she’s in debt until after we’ve become serious.
So, both sides are interested to know whether there would be any change in student loans after marriage. Public Service Loan Forgiveness is a federal student loan forgiveness program that can eliminate the federal student loan debt for borrowers who commit to public service careers. After 120 “qualifying payments” while working for approved nonprofit or government employers, borrowers can receive a complete discharge of their federal student debt. However, I would like to see that they were making choices to reduce it. Taking on student loan debt after the wedding generally becomes your responsibility as a couple—even if no one co-signs the loan. Be sure you understand your state’s rules about community property and realize a judge will consider your entire financial situation in the event of divorce.
However, his most recent girlfriend, “Noelle,” seems to be really different. She’s 24, earns 80k in a corporate job, supports herself, and somehow also plans to go to medical school when she’s in her early 30’s, so takes science classes in the evening/weekends. My nephew “Joshua” and I have always been really close. We share the same interest in blue-collar jobs, sports, and cars. I’m a mechanic, and Joshua has tried to follow in my footsteps while also exploring welding and landscaping.
The amount of debt a potential spouse has can be concerning. But there’s a lot more to think about when marrying someone with student loans. Preferably, the indebted party initiates this conversation, says Oakland University professor Terri Orbuch, author of 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage From Good to Great. The responses will indicate if the couple can effectively manage the debt together, or if their approaches to money are irreconcilable. After all, the single most important component of a successful, long-term relationship is having similar attitudes when it comes to money and finances, she adds.
A 2018 Fidelity Investments Couples and Money study found that 40% of people bringing debt into a relationship report it having a negative impact. It’s not hard to see why marrying someone with student loan debt puts you at higher risk for marital difficulties. Not that keeping your money separate can’t work; Orbuch says it’s manageable as long as both parties are clear about how their money is divided. But all people with an indebted spouse need to know they’re going to be taking on an added responsibility, if not financially, then at least emotionally.
Some have also discussed work requirements for Medicaid, the joint federal-state health care program for low-income households. When I met my now-husband Brandon, we decided to go to a movie as our first date. I had some dates who were taken aback by my blunt approach to finances, and I never heard from them again. Sobriety takes determination and commitment as does being in a relationship with a recovering addict. Recovering alcoholics and recovering addicts know the key to relationships is honesty and openness. Use the early stages of your relationship to get to know one another, discuss triggers, and even boundaries.
That’s why Spira advises, “If you’re concerned someone is dating you for your money, leave your wallet and purse behind.” People call in toThe Ramsey Showevery day to share and celebrate their debt-free victories—sometimes after paying off six figures’ worth of debt. The reality is, you’ll end up spending more on monthly payments—plus interest—than you would have spent if you had just bought the thing outright. Get yourself $1,000 in the bank as a starter emergency fund. Then use the debt snowball method to pay off your debt once and for all! You’ll finally have your entire income back in your hands, to build security and wealth by saving up a full emergency fund, investing and paying off your mortgage.